the mooner

Moi à Bordeaux

Felt like writing some french. Three words and then I got tired. 

But - I have a fun story to tell. I have had ma tête en l'air these last days - which means I've been very clumsy and haven't really had any idea what was going on. 

Thursday: Thursday is a one heck of a day. I meet at 8:00 AM and finish at 6:00 PM. The alarmed rang at 6:07 AM as usual and I went downstairs to have my yoghurt with some almonds and müsli. After that we have the hair/make-up routine which takes about 20 minutes and after that I get dressed. I realized that I'd spent way to much time in the bathroom this morning, leaving me with 5 minutes to get dressed and out of the door. So I did. Grabbed a pair of stockings, my knitted t-shirt, Isabel Marant cardigan and boots and I was off.

1 hour later I'm sitting in math class and thinking about how it is actually possible to feel so bored. Trying to force myself to look interested in what ever was going on on the white board, I put my hands on my legs to warm them up a bit. Except. Where the fuck are my pants. I didn't put god-damn pants on this morning. I feel so ashamed writing this. I was wearing my awesome boots, stockings, t-shirt and a cardigan. That's fucking it.
So what do you do then? I told Maëlys who was next to me and she nearly pissed herself laughing. Hah. So did I, really. 
My jacket just covered up my poor behind - I chose the perfect day to wear my white grand-ma pants. This just keeps getting better and better. Just wait.
After math I did everything I could to cover up my assets. The bell rang and everyone hurried up and packed their stuff and I was late again. I packed up my stuff quickly, but dropped a pencil. My back was facing the white board, and who stands near the white board? The teacher. Monsieur. So I mooned him. White grand-ma butt right in ya face. 

It gets better.

After covering up my butt for several hours - you could see I wasn't wearing anything under even though my jacket covered up - lunch came. Maëlys' voice was numb (?) from laughing and we sat down and started eating. A lady in a I-feel-no-need-for-sexual-attention suit came walking through the cafeteria and stopped at our table. 
"Bonjour mademoiselle, la CPE m'a dit qu'il faut que tu aies à la vie scolaire toute suite. Tu n'es pas bien habillé et ça ne va pas du tout!"
- It means: Hello miss, the CPO told me to tell you that you have to go to the main office this instant, you're not well dressed (dress code) and it's not acceptable at  all.

I knew that many of the students had seen me. People knew the color of my underwear. I went with Maëlys and I had to come up with a long explanation about how I forgot it and how sorry I was. Ridiculous. Where I come from there is no dress code and people can dress as they want to. This doesn't mean that everyone goes around dressing up like prostitutes, but you wear short shorts and a low top if you feel like. I could not take this seriously. But I had to pretend that I did. 
And even worse is: The CPE had to give me her slouchy jeans for me to wear the rest of the day. I believe I can "work" every outfit if I really try, but damn it, I could not work those awful pair of pants sent from somewhere evil.

So there we go. Five hours spent looking ridiculous and trying to avoid people even though everyone knows the exchange student from Denmark who likes to dress up naughty. She might even have secret "meetings" as that call it (lame) in the bathroom. That's just great.

I can't really do anything, but laugh. Which is what I'm supposed to. "I started crying because I forgot to wear pants" - haha, it makes me laugh right now to write it down. It's idiotic. And people can set what they want - I got through half a day in grand-ma slouchy jeans - and you call me weak!?

I have many other stories like that if you'd like to hear. 

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